First Rule of the Zombie Apocalypse: Cardio

509 Calories, 3.86 Miles, 45 Minutes

Yesterday I ran for 40 minutes + a 5 minute cooldown.  I want to get faster.  I started the first 20 minutes at a 5.8 pace, when that got too much for me and the remaining 20 minutes of my goal run for the day were taunting me, I reduced my speed to a 5.0.  Luckily - I finished and didn't even have to stop.  Guess I'm not that out of shape, eh? 

Inspiration is knowing that Zombies will be chasing you in August and I need to be fast.  I want to get my average speed to at least a 6.0 on the treadmill which equals a 10 minute mile.  That's ah-hundid-poicent doable. 

Last night my husband and I were talking... about zombies.  Yes, I realize at this point it is becoming quite unhealthy to actually believe that zombies could potentially walk this earth - even though I know it's totally not true or possible, at least that's what my subconscious that wants me to be able to sleep at night wants me to believe.  But just before bed... wait, I should rephrase... JUST BEFORE I TURNED OFF ALL AWARENESS AND BECAME SUPER VULNERABLE my husband joked that it would be HILARIOUS to hire 20 people to play zombies and to have them just be in our house at night. 

Background about me: I get up at least once a night to go to the bathroom...

Can you imagine what sleepy me would do if I saw not 1, not 2, not even 10 but 20 people in my living room dressed as zombies!  Not to mention the fact that I obviously got up to pee.  3 things would spontaneously happen... 1st, of course, I would pee myself.  2nd, I would HURT THESE PEOPLE.  And I suppose the most likely of these things is that my husband would be sleeping in the other room, or another house for a while for terrifying me.  But then he'd be quickly invited back in our room to sleep on the floor because I'm afraid of zombies and he's scarred me for life. 

I think that I not only need to get faster, but I need to start learning to wield a weapon.  After discussing the zombie apocalypse for the last week or so with people online and at work - pause for a moment: my life is so awesome - We came to the conclusion that you need to have a weapon that isn't a gun because ammo runs out.  Therefore, I've decided my weapon of choice is a garden shovel, with the spade on the end and the handle at the end of the stick. 

I've clearly given this too much though and I'm now afraid that I'm losing my audience.  Here's something funny to leave you with: