We have a baby sitter. I mean a baby who sits. Not a baby sitter just yet for those date nights...
How does this kid not fall over? Seriously, he's solid.
Nolan has started at his new day care! Jamie is awesome, and I can tell he just loves playing with another baby all day long. It's just Nolan and Maddie so I know he's getting a lot of attention.
Although I have to admit, last night was not one of my favorites. After a series of nights of little to no sleep, I decided I needed a break and slept in the basement where it was quiet. Of course this decision was made in the middle of the night when I'd just about had it with the crying and I needed a break.
This was finally the straw that broke the camels back where I decided that I need to do whatever I can to get more rest.
To be honest, I thought I was against the Cry It Out philosophy. And who knows, maybe I still am. But at this point, I'm embracing it. I'm planning on starting to let Nolan cry it out so he can go to sleep on his own and I can get some much needed rest.
Simply put - I just don't think I'm being the best "me" when I'm not rested. And after 6 months of sleep deprivation I'm finally putting my foot down. This includes probably stopping breastfeeding (a concept which has honestly had me at odds with myself for months now) and doing formula full time along with baby food.
Weaning from breastfeeding is honestly one of the most emotional decisions I'm struggling with at the moment. Of course IN the moment when my baby is screaming and I can't get him to sleep all I can do is think "that's it, this is over!" and just letting Brian take over more of the night feedings. (if there should be night feedings at all, but that's another story)
The hardest part of the CIO thing is the opposition to it. The GUILT placed on mothers who aren't doing everything according to The Perfect Mother's Guidebook to Being a Sanctimommy Douche Canoe. Honestly, anyone that has a negative opinion about it can fuck off. You don't know what's best for me and my baby. And maybe if I had the resources to to hire help while I stayed at home and napped all day I could do it. But I honestly don't.
So yeah, what started as a light hearted blog has turned into a guilt fueled angry post that makes me stabby.
I hate that you're seriously lacking sleep and getting frustrated... you're being a fabulous mother, and I hope you can get some renewing rest soon!!
ReplyDeleteWe started doing a modified CIO when my son turned 3 months old (oh, the horror!). I was getting sick of the whole song and dance routine it took to get him to fall asleep, and the frequent "hey I just woke up and don't know how to put myslef back to sleep so I will cry and squawk until you come give me attention" sessions in the middle of the night were getting to be to much.
ReplyDeleteI'm not going to lie - the first day was ridiculously hard, and we were only letting him cry for 3 minutes before soothing him. But it hasn't even been a month yet, and he is able to put himself to sleep relatviely quickly (and with very little protest) and he sleeps so much better at night. And guess what? It didn't kill him. He is still the smiliest baby I know.
Do whatever you feel is right for you and your son. If any Sanctimommy gives you flack for it, I will happily knock her off her douche canoe for you.
Good luck, and hope you get some much needed rest soon!
CIO isn't for everyone, but it is the right choice for some. I know you're not going to let him scream for hours and hopefully, you will all be able to get good quality rest.
ReplyDeleteLook at that big boy!