Murphy's Law

All before noon today, just about everything that could go wrong did.

Regular MOTN  feeding for Max - he actually slept quite well with about 5-6 hours since his last feed he woke up around 3:30. As per usual, I don't go to sleep right away after feeding because by the time I'm in bed after a feeding my mind is awake so I am messing around on Reddit when I hear Nolan crying in the distance around 4:30 so I hop right up to help him. He was making moaning and groaning sounds... and he throws up. Not a great deal, mind you, especially compared to what happened the other night which was like that scene from the exorcist. But yeah.

So I try to get him back to sleep since the puking incident wasn't particularly noteworthy. Isn't that sad? Well, he's awake and ready to roll and in his usual demeanor (ie very cheerful boy with too much energy - poor mama!). He convinces me that it's time to go "houses" (that's what it sounds like when he says "downstairs") because he's "hungy". He's a fibber - he wasn't hungry. It was a rouse to get himself down one flight of stairs... one flight closer to the TV room where Paw Patrol is sitting on the DVR.

Well, we go downstairs and of course he doesn't eat anything which is fine. I hem and haw about whether or not he should go to daycare because I'm already feeling useless as a human, let alone as a mom! He didn't seem that sick after all.

Then the poopsplosions began.

I'm talking pure liquid brown disgusting stuff.

I took pictures but for the sake of your lunch I'm not going to post them. I took pictures because around 8:00, just 1.5 hours after Brian left for work, I called him and told him to come home right away and not to give me any grief about it (he didn't).

But basically the poop didn't absorb into his diaper but instead was everywhere and literally... just... poured out of his diaper when I finally cleaned off his body to lay him down to change him. The horror.

So I get Brian to come home and deal with the puking (oh yes, there was puke in between the poopsplosions) and all that jazz.

Guess who clogs the toilet? This girl. Y'welcome America. We plunge it clear. NBD. Move along with our lives until...

The basement is flooded. Whattheeverlivingf*ck?

I'm not going to go into details, but I had a strong concern that my actions resulted in this mess (which wasn't smelly at all! the liquid flooding was thankfully ONLY water).

Had to call Roto Rooter (is that a national thing or a local to Iowa company?). They came out and fixed it right away. $112 well spent.

I'm glossing over the fact that it was because of the toilet I eventually flushed that the basement flooded. By way of background, I'd hear that toilet being flushed and a loud splash in the basement when I was watching TV several times. So I know what I did was the complete cause of the splashing that was occurring in the basement now for several weeks... blugh.

But yeah. While the basement was flooding my mom was driving down from her house to help me out. I sent an SOS message out to her shortly after Nolan puked. So thankfully with Brian there and my mom OTW reinforcements were forthcoming.

By the time my mom gets here, I have Maxwell down for a nap IN HIS CRIB (where's my trophy?) and Nolan is doing *meh*, but way better than before.

Seriously my mom arrived around 10:00, Roto Rooter around 11:00, and by noon everything seemed in control.

My state was "floppy" - if that makes sense. I was (and still am) exhausted from a general lack of sleep and everything going on. I say floppy because I was on the recliner with no bone structure to speak of and limp on the chair while feeding Maxwell, so literally energy is being drained from my body.

I go back and forth on this, but by 12 everything was in control. I honestly felt bad that I had my mom drive an hour and a half to sit on the couch. She got to see the kiddos and she did DEFINITELY help but I felt bad still. "I wish you had some poop to clean up," I say jokingly. I'm sure she's glad everything was under control!

Adventures in motherhood.

Send coffee.

PS I'm wearing a bra since the Roto Rooter guy came out. This thing does not fit right and the girls are falling out. #notforpublicviewing