Me and my boys

This house has been sick lately. I had mastitis, Nolan pink eye (twice), all of us had the flu... Ugh. But today I'm feeling like my head is above water as far a health and responsibilities go.

Nolan has been home 3/5 "school days" the past few weeks making me paranoid that daycare is thinking we're keeping him home to hide abuse or something (I've been watching a lot of law and order svu). 

Right now I just feel pretty happy holding my boys all squeezed onto the same little recliner. These little butts are nice and tiny so we can all share the same chair, but they're going to grow up soon enough and be content in their own chair. It's one of those days where I'm thankful that we're all under one roof because one day they're going to go to college and/or move out and I won't have us all together anymore.

Before I finished typing that last sentence Nolan just climbed off my lap and started screaming that he wants yogurt...

This Time Around

Oh it's going to be so different with 2 kids. So much harder in some ways but at least I can look forward to the fact that Brian no longer has to drive 45 minutes each way to work and that I can text him to pick up cereal on the way back to the house.

The biggest difference with maternity leave this time around will be that it's not just me and baby. It's me, baby and a toddler that wants to watch "ow-vees" [movies] or listen to "ow-zic" [music]. I have resigned myself to making sure Nolan continues daycare for at least 3 days a week if not completely full time at daycare. It's honestly just too hard to think about having Nolan and a little baby without the help of another adult! 

Speaking of a difficult toddler... Nolan was really difficult yesterday when I took him to a big brother class that the hospital offered. I'm giving the little man the benefit of the doubt that he started a new daycare that day after 11 days off with me for holiday leave. I'm sure it was just exhausting getting to know the new kids, playing with the new toys, getting to know the new teacher, etc. But the poor kid was NOT having the class. It was like I was trying to rip his skin off and start him on fire. 

I had to snapchat shame him by sending a video of Nolan trying to escape the room while screaming. The other parents looked at me with that "I've been there" smile. Although I'm sure many of them were like "can't she handle her kid?" which I might be projecting but I seriously was embarrassed for the tantrum heard round the hospital. 

We ended up leaving a little bit early because of this which bummed me out. I was really hoping he'd take advantage of the baby dolls and listening to the woman tell him how to change diapers etc. As we were leaving the woman instructing the course says, "try and get him in the next session" which I suppose I could do but I definitely will have a baby by then since they only offer the course once a month. 

Sorry to toddler shame you, Nolan!

I have no idea if when I'm old or after I die that Nolan and new baby will ever read this blog... I do sometimes cloud what I write with only positive experiences and hide the negative. I feel bad writing stuff that isn't really all positive about Nolan right now, but at the same time he really did have a long day and I am giving him the benefit of the doubt. When we got home he really wanted to be held. Well first he wanted to be naked (his MO) and then he wanted to be held. I know that means that he just didn't have the energy for the class that day and maybe if it were next week and he had a chance to get acclimated to the new daycare he wouldn't have been such a naughty boy. I cuddled with that little man in between other tantrums he was having. 

It's hard to be a mom some days, but then there's the moments where the kiddo just shows you pure love. I know he's my little man and he might be a stinker sometimes but he's MY stinker and I'm so lucky. 

So Future Nolan, if you are reading this, then I'm sorry for shaming you. You're definitely worth every tantrum. 

Holy Bandwidth Batman

In case the gifs from last week didn't slow you down, here's my photobook (volume 2 of Nolan's first year) for you all to enjoy!

 

Click here to view this photo book larger

My little man

On the 2nd Friday in July 2013, I decided to call it a temporary quits and officially start maternity leave. Brian and I went on walks multiple times a day, long before this and we really stepped it up after I went on leave. I went to a chiropractor to get acupuncture to help stimulate things and little did I know that it may have actually worked because I went into labor on the 2nd Saturday of July.

Looking back on this incredible year, I just know that I am extremely lucky to have my little Nolan in my life. He is truly the best little guy I could ask for. Sure, he's a bit of a stinker at times - like when he gets impatient while I'm trying to wipe his butt during a diaper change and he tries crawling away - but darnit I love the crap out of that kid!

Newborn

3 Months

6 Months

9 Months

Coming soon: a 12 month picture (we're getting those taken next week)

This weekend is his first birthday party. I have to admit that I've been kind of slacking in the planning department. But I know we can get the essentials: beer, food, and games. Even though we're having a Sunday event, I think a little beer goes hand in hand with bags or ladder golf.

I remember when we first brought Nolan home, Brian and I were scared but excited. The first thing we did (after soothing him from a cranky car ride home) was show him around the house. "This is your room!" we said.

As we moved from room to room in the house, we knew our lives were forever changed. We gave Nolan nicknames... a lot of them:

• Little buddy
• Pumpkin or Punky
• Little man
• Baby Nolan
• Stinker McGinker

We smothered him in kisses. And as he grew older he started to giggle as we interacted with him. A sound that will forever make me smile. For some reason he loves it when I turn into a super creepy "witch" mom and I start saying, "I'm going to steal allllll the baby kisses, and allllllll the baby hugs!"

He has 8 teeth and he'll chomp on your finger when you're brushing them
He is a walker
He hates it when I clip his fingernails
He loves eating bananas
He knows exactly what he shouldn't be getting into and gets into it right away
He climbs stairs and when he gets past the wall where he can't see me, he waits until I get there into view and then starts racing up the stairs away from me
He loves playing peekaboo
He says "mama" and "dada" and is starting to say "ba" and "na" sounds
He'll eat just about anything you give him
He can climb off of big furniture (like a bed or couch) without getting hurt

He's always been a very happy baby. Even if he doesn't like to sleep through the night... still. He's happy to be awake whenever we see him.

When he was really little, he'd sleep with his hands up by his ears like he was doing a lazy version of the "touchdown" sign.

One of my favorite things that I already miss is when he was brand new and we'd put him on the mat and he'd just kick kick with his little feet.

We spent our first really long weekend away from him last weekend and when we returned he was so happy to see us! I would pick him up and he'd give me a little hug and then he'd see his daddy and leap towards him to be held by him and to give him a big hug, and then he'd see me again and leap towards me and so on.

He is such an amazing little man, I am so lucky to have him in my life.

Stranger Danger

I just had it click in my head that I should start writing more stories about Nolan while he grows up. So here's my attempt to start telling a little more.

This week, I have hired a babysitter to come over every day since our regular providers is in the NE for a family reunion. Even after being with her for 2 days, he's still feeling unfamiliar with her and clings to me the minute she shows up.

It's so hopelessly adorable to observe him and interact with him. He's not scared of his babysitter, but he doesn't want me to leave. It's one of those things that, as a mother, you just love/hate. I love that he loves to have me near him but I hate that he gets so sad when I have to go.

So when the sitter gets there he holds on a little extra tight. He doesn't want to be put on the ground. He barely wants me out of his sight. This morning I tried to help distract him by sitting behind him while playing with a toy so I could sneak away when he started having fun, but he was leaning on me. He never needs to lean on me because he can sit on his own, but he was leaning back as if it's just one more way to touch me. He could tell that I started adjusting my body to stand up.

He is so hard to leave in the mornings. Especially when he starts to get extra snuggly when I'm about to go.

On the other side of that coin, it's wonderful coming home to him. Yesterday, he made a loud squeak and just "ran" to me. So extremely cute!